According to most people, happiness is the ultimate goal. But what if there’s something else that makes you feel even better, and it’s easier to attain? Most people are on a quest to discover happiness, believing that they will find meaning in life once they do. But what is happiness, really?
Happiness is a way of thinking, not a goal to be achieved. Having plenty of money does not equate happiness. Being famous also doesn’t mean being happy. Even being in love isn’t the same as being happy. Thus, if we place our happiness on money, success or relationships, happiness will always elude us.
We all want to be happy. If we can’t find happiness in all those lofty goals, how do we hope to feel happy in life? The good news is that we don’t need to achieve money success or love success to be happy. Look at little children, they’re neither rich nor in love nor famous, but their smiles and laughter are very much genuine. They already have all they need to be happy. Same with you. You already have all you need to be happy.
Of course, being an adult comes with responsibilities and worldly worries that unburden children. However, adults can be happy too, even with responsibilities. Happiness is a state of mind. If your state of mind is unburdened by worries, happiness is definitely within reach. If you’re not stuck in the past or anxious for the future, happiness can be waiting for you in the present. Mindfulness and living in the moment are the keys to happiness.
Shifting the Focus from Happiness to Alignment.
We’re accustomed to search for happiness outside of us. We work hard to achieve success and we look to others to fulfill us in relationships. But we always want more. If we have money, we want more money. If we have success, we want more fame, more widespread success. If we have love, we want more from our partner. In short, we can get no satisfaction.
When do we stop seeking for more sources of joy and satisfaction? When we feel fulfilled.
When you stand up for what you believe in, you feel fulfilled even if your goals haven’t been reached. When you love fully without expectations, you feel satisfied and deep joy when your beloved are happy. When you live true to who you are, you’re at peace. When you heart and your brain are in alignment, you feel complete. There’s nothing else to yearn for. Isn’t that happiness?
Ways to Create Fulfillment in Your Life
1. Be Mindful of How You Spend Your Time
Become more mindful of how you spend your time and actively seek out activities that you find fulfilling. Try to do at least one thing you enjoy frequently, if not everyday, maybe every week. Do you like to hike? Plan for it every weekend. Do you like painting? Follow your muse and disregard all criticism.
Do things simply for your enjoyment. You make time for what’s important to you. So make time for joy and for relationships. Spend time with your loved ones. Spend time learning about yourself. In the beginning, you might want to ignore the cynical voice in your head and just follow your heart. There’s no need to be a goal, a point, a purpose. You do things purely for your enjoyment. Once you’re re-familiarized yourself with joy, you can start bring your brain in the equation. Your balance is when your heart and your brain are aligned.
2. Show Yourself Love
Don’t be afraid to give yourself unconditional love by learning to accept and even love yourself for all that you are. When you learn to love yourself, you will stop looking for someone else to give you that love.
Relationships are undoubtedly important to all of us. But know yourself and love yourself enough to have healthy boundaries. Build supportive relationships and walk away from toxic ones. The person that needs your love the most is yourself.
3. Practice Gratitude
When you are grateful for what you have, you will find that you have more to be thankful for. You will feel more fulfilled because you will have more things to appreciate and be grateful for instead of focusing on what you don’t have.
Even in less than ideal situations, there’s always something to be grateful for. Acknowledge your current reality, search for solutions if needed but don’t forget to see what you do have or what’s working for you. It can be small like you get out of bed today but miracles don’t need to be big to be wonderful.
We live in a difficult time and life can be full of sufferings. Around the world, we have so many challenges: pandemic, climate change, political unrest, war, poverty, etc. that can be so overwhelming. Happiness feels out of reach more than ever. But you don’t need world peace or everything perfect to be happy. You have everything you need within you to find the happiness you’ve been seeking. Come back to the present, every moment, every day. Be mindful to the tiny wonders around you. When you change the way you look at things, your life changes. Life isn’t easy but I want to remind you that you’re the miracle you’ve been hoping for.